Friday, January 29, 2010

Go Down Death

I got an email from a blogging friend the other day...she asked me to pray for her because her father is in hospice and my not have much time left. I immediately said one. Then I started thinking of my dad. I know exactly how she father was in hospice for awhile before he passed on.
                 He had COPD and was til the end a chronic smoker. His hospice was in Pinellas Park Florida and I lived here in York Pa. In life my father was a very "complicated" man. I found out after his death that he had been diagnosed with being Bi-Polar when he was younger but was never treated. Growing up with him was scary and hurtful and fearful, but it was also full of laughter and daring and experiences. If you know anything about bi-polar you know they have wild mood swings. From deep dark shopping like crazy and being happy.
                 I think in his heart of hearts he wanted to be a good father. I really do. But the reality was, he wasnt. He was abusive and manipulative and controlling and in the end he died alone. Because of our relationship I never made it a point to go see him. Even though I KNEW he was in hospice. When he died I realized what a fool I had been. NO ONE and I mean NO ONE should die alone without loved ones around. That will always be my biggest regret. I should have been a better daughter AND a better Christian and gone and visited him. Regardless of our relationship!!!
               So as I thought of my blogging buddy, I thought what a joy for her to live near her father. What a blessing to be able to spend the last of his days together and to be able to offer comfort and support to her mother. Someday she will look back and remeber the love that was felt and feel peace.  I wanted to share with her a poem that has always brought me peace when a loved one has died. Its written by James Wheldon Johnson. He was an amazing man who accomplished so much!  I hope she enjoys it and I hope she knows I pray for her nightly!


Weep not, weep not,

She is not dead;

She's resting in the bosom of Jesus.

Heart-broken husband--weep no more;

Grief-stricken son--weep no more;

Left-lonesome daughter --weep no more;

She only just gone home.

Day before yesterday morning,

God was looking down from his great, high heaven,

Looking down on all his children,

And his eye fell of Sister Caroline,

Tossing on her bed of pain.

And God's big heart was touched with pity,

With the everlasting pity.

And God sat back on his throne,

And he commanded that tall, bright angel standing at his right hand:

Call me Death!

And that tall, bright angel cried in a voice

That broke like a clap of thunder:

Call Death!--Call Death!

And the echo sounded down the streets of heaven

Till it reached away back to that shadowy place,

Where Death waits with his pale, white horses.

And Death heard the summons,

And he leaped on his fastest horse,

Pale as a sheet in the moonlight.

Up the golden street Death galloped,

And the hooves of his horses struck fire from the gold,

But they didn't make no sound.

Up Death rode to the Great White Throne,

And waited for God's command.

And God said: Go down, Death, go down,

Go down to Savannah, Georgia,

Down in Yamacraw,

And find Sister Caroline.

She's borne the burden and heat of the day,

She's labored long in my vineyard,

And she's tired--

She's weary--

Do down, Death, and bring her to me.

And Death didn't say a word,

But he loosed the reins on his pale, white horse,

And he clamped the spurs to his bloodless sides,

And out and down he rode,

Through heaven's pearly gates,

Past suns and moons and stars;

on Death rode,

Leaving the lightning's flash behind;

Straight down he came.

While we were watching round her bed,

She turned her eyes and looked away,

She saw what we couldn't see;

She saw Old Death.She saw Old Death

Coming like a falling star.

But Death didn't frighten Sister Caroline;

He looked to her like a welcome friend.

And she whispered to us: I'm going home,

And she smiled and closed her eyes.

And Death took her up like a baby,

And she lay in his icy arms,

But she didn't feel no chill.

And death began to ride again--

Up beyond the evening star,

Into the glittering light of glory,

On to the Great White Throne.

And there he laid Sister Caroline

On the loving breast of Jesus.

And Jesus took his own hand and wiped away her tears,

And he smoothed the furrows from her face,

And the angels sang a little song,

And Jesus rocked her in his arms,

And kept a-saying: Take your rest,

Take your rest.

Weep not--weep not,

She is not dead;

She's resting in the bosom of Jesus.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Will it work?

Okay, so I was up late the other night (little man WOULD NOT sleep) and I watched this infomercial. I got totally hooked. Now I'm thinking I need to buy this.

The workouts looked cool and somewhat do-able...............but I dont know. I mean, I do belong to a gym that I NEVER go to and I do have the Windsor Pilates DVD along with the Burn DVD's and some other Kathy Smith DVD's.  I hate this. I hate excercising and dieting and all the other stuff that goes with it. I guess I should just get back into running again......but this does look cool!

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Resolution smesolution!

I don't like to make New Years Resolutions. Not that there aren't things I need to work on or do. I just don't like them because I always break them by the 2nd day! ALWAYS! My list this year was the same thing as last year and the same as the year before that.....well you get the point. So instead of a "New Years Resolution" I am now going to make it my to do that? I ALWAYS finish my to do really bugs me if I don't. I can be quite obsessive about getting things done in the time and the way that I want them done. My husband can attest to that! We will see if this works here are my "Top Ten Things To Do"

1. Bestow Happiness: I consider myself a happy person. I sooo do not take myself seriously, I like to kid around and just have fun. This past year I have allowed negative people who do not REALLY know me to judge me and bring me down. I have NEVER cared what the opinions of others are but where I have really dissapointed myself is I have not shown MORE happiness to those who are negative. I have basically written them off. That is not the RIGHT way to I will try to be more positive and more caring to those I dont like.

2. Enjoy the Day: I get so caught up in the bags I have to make or the house that I have to clean that there are days that pass by so quickly I completely miss them. I want to start taking the time to ENJOY the day and reflect.

3. Nourish My Soul: Somedays I feel like I am so far from being what God had intended. I NEED to make it a priority to make Him the priority!

4. Lose Weight: YADA YADA YADA!  Can I just forget this one?

5. Enrich My Boys: I want them to read alot more than they do and I want them to experience how wonderfully beautiful everyday is!

6. Seduce My Husband: Any married couple with children knows how hard it is to keep romance alive. It is the foundation for all that is wonderful in a marriage but it can be the one thing that is so easy to put on the back burner. I want dates and hugs and kisses and most of all I want the wonderful man the Lord chose to put in my life to know that he is all the world to me. I could not have asked for a better father to my children or a better provider!

7: Be A Better Friend: I have alot of friends....but out of those only a handful are what I call "my soul sisters" they stand beside me in times of stupidity, they recognize the person on the inside and most importantly they NEVER JUDGE!!! Everyone needs friends like that....and I want to make sure that I am that friend to them!

8: Practice Frugality: This should be easy to do as we are an extremely frugal couple, but there are always ways we can improve upon it.

9: Take Risks: I want to push the envelope of life and do things that are scary and challenging and hard. All for the purpose of saying " I did it!!!"

10: Do A Marathon: Okay this is sooooo not going to happen this year....but it's worth putting on here cause ya never know!

So what do ya think? Somethings will be easy, some will be hard but I think they are all pretty do-able. What's on YOURE to do list?

Monday, January 4, 2010

I was so spoiled on my birthday

My birthday was simply the BEST this year.  I came home to find this absolutely gorgeous flower arrangment from my momma......they smell just as beautiful as they look

And then my fabulous, sexy, amazing husband made me THE BEST pork BBQ I have EVER eaten. He spent all day looking online and in cookbooks for a recipe for the type of sauce that I like. It has to be the southern spicy/tangy style!!!!  It was simply divine......better than any I have ever gotten down south!

And of course you cant have BBQ without coleslaw.....thats a crime!!! So he made me homestyle coleslaw...FROM SCRATCH! Lordy I love this man!

And to top it all off was the perfect ending. A chocolate cake with peanut butter icing. Pure Divinity!

But wait it gets better. My husband knows that I am an absolute book freak! I read at least 3 books a week. Now before you ask how I have time with 3 kids and all the sewing I do.....if you're a book lover like me, you will ALWAYS find the time!  He also knows that I have such a hard time getting out to my local paperback trade store to get any books with the little one and all the other stuff I have to do and forget the library.....I just paid a 42$ bill for overdue books! So what did this wonderful man do you might ask.........

HE BOUGHT ME AN ELECTRONIC READER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This little baby is so amazing. You can go online and download ANY book you want in like 5 minutes! ALL IN YOUR HOME! AAAHHHH, I am sooo in love. I put 3 on here when I got it and I have already read through the first and now I'm on the second.  What a smart thing I did in marrying him!

Christmas Joy

Oh the joy of Christmas!  We had such a wonderful one this year. I am sooooo blessed with family and absolutely, truly, wonderful friends!!!!  The boys got "just what I wanted!" from Santa and managed to make my house look like a bomb went off in 10 minutes!

only the little one would smile for me.....the rest were too busy looking at their things. They got too much alot of stuff.....but everyone was happy....and best of all..........................................................

mom got quiet time!!!!